Making a Call

11 June, Wednesday - Taking Initiative. With things seemingly moving forward again with my wife taking a lover (G) and with her mentally getting closer and closer to physically consumating their relationship and becoming a shared wife / hotwife (It really has only been a couple of inconvenient 'circumstances' that have prevented G and my wife from actually getting together to fuck - both times, my wife was away from the house when they've been talking), I'm feeling the need to: stay in the loop, be relevant to the process, and/or have some control in what is starting to feel like a 'certainty' versus just a 'possibility'.

It is an odd feeling standing at the edge of something that has the potential to forever alter, either positively or negatively, the dynamics - certainly of my wife's and my relationship - but also, that of friends and groups of friends within the framework of a relatively small town. I believe, still, very much, that our marriage will benefit from introducing others into our bed and from sharing my wife with other men and women. I think that the spark of excitement that will result, will spread to and help grow other areas of our marriage...Or the whole experience could crash and burn.

I reckon it's the uncertainty of the ultimate result or consequence that makes it both exciting and somewhat scary.

Anyway, it's been this feeling that we are rapidly approaching a point-of-no-return, that has caused me to jump in. I liken it to jumping into a cool swimming pool without first probing the temperature of the water versus easing yourself slowly into the water.

I talked with G today on the phone about things.

I've always encouraged my wife to let her potential lovers know that her husband was perfectly aware of her extramarital activities (ie. 'I tell my husband everything...'; 'My husband knows everything I do...'; 'I'll have to ask my husband...'; 'My husband likes it when I (show myself off to other men)'; 'My husband approves any men who I'm with first'; etc...) I've always felt it clarifies everyone's role in the matter upfront. Letting potential lovers know this is all the more important when they happen to be friends or others that we already know socially. It prevents that awkwardness between us as friends. Unfortunately, she's not been able to (or possibly unwilling) to 'leak' while flirting, that I am aware and approve of her playing with and fucking other men. This has been the case with G. He has had no idea that I have always been aware of her flirtations with him, nor that I approve of and have encouraged her to further their relationship sexually.

I've considered from time to time, taking the lead and being proactive in having her be shared by speaking to my wife's 'candidates' directly about sharing her with them. It's not been the easiest thing though, since 'wife-sharing' is not generally a conversation opener - rather it's a very opportunistic subject, rarely given an opening.

Today, because of our ratcheted-up talk and seemingly increased willingness of my wife to actually fuck G, I contacted him. I sent him a text telling him that I wanted to talk with him in person about he and my wife. I wanted to meet with him and/or grab a drink as we discussed possibilities of furthering things between he and my wife. He called me instead and left a message. I stepped out of the house to return his call. He was pretty defensive, as was to be expected when one receives a call from a friend who's the husband of a woman one's been flirting with. He dummied-up pretty good (you know what they say: deny, deny, deny), until I told him everything was alright, that I knew about all of the flirting between he and my wife. Without getting into great detail, I think he was on his heels through most of the conversation, not knowing exactly what to make of it all, and trying to sort it out on the fly with me on the phone. In the end, I told him our concerns about discretion and the perils of playing in our own 'backyard' and told him the three of us could have some fun if he was interested. While he assured me that he would be completely discreet about any sexual relationship, it seemed like too much for him to digest on this one call and we agreed to talk again, in person next time. We shall see how it goes.

I'm still a proponent of up-front disclosure by my wife with her potential lovers...perhaps because that method of being bold characterizes the 'hotwife' persona best.

I haven't yet mentioned to her that I've spoken to G. Tomorrow.