On the Pill Now

08 June, Sunday. Back in the Saddle? - We attended a social function last night. My wife wore my favorite dress - an above the knee, tight-fitting dress that accentuates her curves. She looked very sexy in her heels, anklet, and jewelry. Unfortunately, I had to be up very early in the morning and left early after asking some friends of ours if they could make sure she gets home.

She arrived home not too much later than me, and started running her hands all over my body after climbing into bed naked next to me. I told her how sexy I thought she had looked at the party. She told me how she loves being sexy for me and others. "I got lots of compliments on how good I looked tonight" I asked, "Was there anyone there you wanted to be with?" "No" came her answer. "But sometimes I still want B." B was at the party as well last night - I had watched her out of the corner of my eye give him a tight hug and kiss when he first arrived and reminded her now to be bold with B, really holding the hug, caressing him while clinched, pressing her body into his when she hugged him, and/or giving him a lingering kiss on the lips, long enough for him to not mistake her intentions. I thought to myself that I should have asked B to be responsible for getting her home.

I told her that I liked leaving her at the party, dressed sexily as she was and being at home wondering who she was flirting with - imagining who might be hitting on her or trying to seduce her. She said she likes it when I leave her like that as well.

I told my wife that I've visualized her in many different scenarios while she's been out alone like this - I described a couple scenes as I played with her pussy: Slow dancing closely with someone at a club, feeling his hard cock pressed up against her belly, he starts feeling her up while on the dance floor, running his hands all over her ass, eventually working his hand up and under her skirt to feel and finger her pussy. He works my wife into a dark corner where he continues to play with her; Being driven home by someone, the car pulling into our driveway and as I look out the window, I see her get into the backseat with the driver and proceed to make out with him while parked in our driveway. I watch her as she straddles him, lowering herself down onto his cock, and rides him vigorously as the windows steam them out of my view. A short while later, she walks up the stairs and into the house, freshly fucked and full of cum. "You can can let them cum inside you now that you are on the pill", I said. "Yes!", she panted. "You'll walk into our bedroom, your pussy full of another man's cum." "Yes, and you can check my pussy" she added. We started fucking.

"B can cum inside my pussy" she suddenly said to me. "Yes, you 'd like that, wouldn't you? It's naughty to have another man besides your husband cum inside your unprotected pussy, isn't it?" "Yes"

"It will be just like when F used to cum inside your pussy when he used to fuck you. (Her co-worker from her affair years ago - she had confessed that she would let him cum inside her pussy whenever they fucked) You liked letting F fuck you bareback and fill your pussy while I was busy at work, didn't you?" "Yes"

"Now you can let your lovers cum inside you once again. I like it when you are naughty...a naughty little wife." She said, "Let's be naughty in the next few days." "And how did you want to be naughty.", I asked my wife. "You can stuff things inside my pussy." "Like what?" "A cucumber" I told her to go to the store and buy the thickest cucumber and a fat squash so that I can stretch her with them. "I'll take pictures of your stuffed pussy. I haven't posted any of your pictures lately for others to see. I'll post them on the web for other men and women to see." "I like that", she said.

My wife told me, "I want you to show him (G) my pictures. I want him to be turned on and I want to know he is stroking his cock while looking at my pictures. I like knowing that he knows what I look like - what my pussy looks like!"

**She has gone back onto the Pill - just started about two weeks ago. I wasn't expecting it, but she came back from a doctor appointment and mentioned that she had. When I asked her why, she replied "For when I sleep with other men." (A nice answer, for sure!, but the real reason I am sure is so her periods can get regular again, since they've gotten irregular in the last year or so.)**

The Month (or so) in Review...

It's been a while since my last post...I've been somewhat busy, haven't had much time to blog, but I do keep notes, mental & otherwise, on the goings on. Time to just catch up with a little recap of things. Nothing too notable to report.


22 March, Saturday. Some Time Alone - We had gone out to dinner last night since we didn't have the kids. Had good sex when we got home, with my wife cumming while riding my cock as I described how G was going to use her pussy and body. In the afternoon, we started watching an x-rated movie. My wife had removed her pants and was spread for me on the couch as we watched. It was a D&S movie. I pulled out the paddle, clips, crop, and several dildos. I pulled and tugged on her clit ring. "I like it when you pull on my clit like that" she whispered to me. I started spanking her pussy and clit using the paddle as well as the crop which she loves. Her pussy quickly got very wet.

She told me Monday she has a waxing appointment. I reminded her about showing up with the balls inside her pussy. I met with a some resistance. Also, reminded her about encouraging the woman to touch or play with her pussy by spreading wider, grinding her ass/hips, or letting out a little moan when she touches and manipulates her pussy. "Yes" she said.

We were watching a hot girl-girl scene of a submissive brunette enthusiastically eating out another dark haired dominant - she was using her entire mouth and lips to eat the pussy in front of her, much like one would eat a soft, juicy, over ripened piece of fruit. "You're going to have your pussy eaten just like that." I told my wife as I mauled her pussy. "You're finding someone for me, right?" I told her I wanted it to be another married wife just like her, a hotwife, a soccer-mom....someone who would come over regularly to suck and play with her while the kids were in school and the husbands were at work...someone to fill her pussy with dildos and plugs.

I put clips on my wifes pussy lips and then pulled her clit ring to extend her clit before putting the last clip directly on her clit. She held my arm tightly as I then manipulated the clips, pulling and stretching her lips and playing with her distended clit. She was enjoying being used this way and had that glazed-over look of lust in her eyes. She would look down at her pussy just to see her clipped clit and her clipped nipples and then look directly into my eyes - her eyes full of desire - her gaze was a look that asked 'What will you be doing to me next?' She was in this 'zone' that she gets in when she is extremely aroused. She loves it when I dominate her and use her body, her pussy, ass, and breasts in any way I desire. The look on her face and in her eyes is unmistakable. The longer I extend the manipulations, the more 'out-of-body' she gets and the harder she cums.

I continued to play with and use her - spanking her breasts and pussy, slapping her clit, pulling and manipulating her lips, fingering and kissing her until suddenly she started cumming. It was sooner than I wanted her to, but she bucked and convulsed as her eyes half closed. Her pussy contracted and throbbed under my hand as she came.


21 March, Friday. "Who have you been thinking about having as a lover?" I asked. "G and B2" She hadn't mentioned B2 in sometime. She had felt they connected last summer and thought there was an attraction on his part towards her as well. "I saw him today a few days ago. I emailed him, too" As she rode me cowgirl, she said " I think G still wants me, he just hasn't tried anything with me."


17 March, Monday. I was telling her how sexy she's been looking as the weather has been warming up outside, dressing in tight fitting tops and showing more skin. She has felt more sexy, especially since she has been exercising and dropping one or two sizes. "I can't wait until summer...after I am done with being [in a high visibility position within the community]...then I can show off more" She told me how she likes it when men (and women) undress her with their eyes.


14 March, Friday. As we fucked and as I was telling her how ready her pussy was for a thick cock to stretch and split her..."Have you found someone for me?" I told her I had been checking the swinglifestyle website where we are members.


12 March, Wednesday. G called her today. My wife had called him yesterday to talk about something. They chatted a little then G mentioned to my wife that they still haven't gotten together for 'coffee or whatever' yet. It was an early day at school for the kids she told him, otherwise she would have time to get together with him. I was home asleep at the time he called. I'd later remind her that she needed to tell him that Mondays and Tuesdays were her 'home alone' days, the days when I would be at work during the daytime and she would be available to play. He asked where I was and she told him I was asleep in the next room - he couldn't have gotten off the phone fast enough - he quickly told her he had to go. She told him it was OK, that she could leave to meet him or walk into another room or outside the house to continue to talk with him, but I think he didn't want to be on the phone with her while I was around.

I've told her many times that she needs to tell him (and any other men), that her husband knows about and approves of her extramarital activities, yet she hasn't found the courage or determination to tell G about me. I am sure it would move the process of her being with G along much quicker. I've contemplated just asking him if he's free during the week, I know he's got a flexible schedule that has him around during the daytime. I need to figure out a reasonably smooth segue in the conversation to bring up him joining us for a threesome.


05 March, Wednesday. Great Head - G called my wife today as we were in the car. She told me afterwards that he still says 'little things' that make her think he's still interested in her. (She feels that because he hasn't made any affirmative moves since they had their 'near-hookup' on 1/29, that he is no longer interested in her - I, however, believe it's for a combination of other reasons - general cautiousness on his part, life in general (busy-ness), and the fact that my wife has not been more forward in telling him what she wants.) I assured her once again that he would be glad to take her to bed.

As is usually the case right before her period, today my wife seemed randy as she invited me to bed a couple hours later this afternoon. As I laid back on the bed, she crawled up naked next to me and started sucking my nipples, which I enjoy. She worked her way down my body slowly, kissing and sucking. When she reached my groin, she teased me even more, playing everywhere but on my thickening cock. She sucked and licked my balls, asking me if I liked it as she did. She took her time today, enjoying herself, enjoying pleasuring me. When she finally took hold of my cock, she worked it like I can't remember when - she took my cock in her hands much like a harmonica or a cob of corn and proceeded to nibble, bite and suck on my shaft causing me to moan in the process. She then gave me the best head in a long time as she sucked my cock into her mouth, gripping my shaft tightly and twisting her fist as she stroked me. She sucked harder than she normally does, creating a delicious suction.

I reached down to her pussy as she continued to pleasure me with her mouth. It was freshly waxed yesterday and felt smooth to the touch. I started fingering her and soon she got that lusty look on her face, spread her legs further apart, and told me how good it felt. I told her how much better it'd feel if it were G behind her playing with her pussy. "Yes" she replied. "Call him ...and invite him over right now" I told her. "Tell him you want him to join us" She was reluctant, mentioning that she was starting her period. "Then you can let him cum in your pussy. You can show him your waxed pussy, feel him slide his fingers inside you instead. You can be sucking your husband's cock as your lover plays inside your pussy."

She was hot now and climbed on top of me, impaled herself on my cock and ground and rode me. I grabbed her ass cheeks, spreading her as we fucked. "You still want G, don't you?" "Yes" she said. "You 'd like to feel his hands spreading your ass, wouldn't you? I know you like bigger men; wouldn't it feel good to have G draped over your back covering you with his large frame?" Again "Yes" "He can slide his cock into your pussy right next to mine."

I continued to encourage her to call G and invite him over. He was home, we had passed by his house on the way to our house just minutes before. The best I could get from her was "I'll tell him I was thinking of him [as I fucked my husband]" I encouraged her, "Tell him how you want to have two men at the same time." We continued fucking, until she tensed and started cumming. I followed immediately after, just from watching her facial expression as she came


03 March, Monday. Waxing Day. I love the feel of my wife's pussy after a fresh waxing. I asked her if she liked having the woman's hands all over her pussy. She said "I liked it when she touched my clit ring." Wow. I asked if she had played with it or pulled and tugged on it as my wife enjoys. "She asked me if she could touch it and I said it was OK." I suggested to my wife that the next time she spread wider for her, or let out a little moan when she touches her pussy or clit ring. I told my wife to tell her to just pull and tug on it at her next waxing in three weeks - to tell her that it's OK if she plays with it. My wife had told her that "my husband likes playing with it."

The waxing lady seems somewhat interested in my wife's piercing as she has asked and talked about it a few times now. My wife says she may want to get one also. She told the waxer that she likes being pierced...and waxed. She like that it's a 'secret'...that it makes her feel naughty. I encouraged her to let the waxing lady play with her pussy whenever she went for a waxing. I told my wife to wear 'the balls' inside her pussy to her next appointment.

I asked my wife if she was also waxed. She was. I suggested to my wife to ask to see her pussy next time. She was a little hesitant. I suggested the context of wanting to see what kind of design she had and how she kept any remaining pussy hair trimmed or styled.

I played with her breasts as I fucked her, squeezing and playing with her stiff nipples. "They're going to be pierced soon, too" she said about her hard nipples. "Something else to make you naughty?....another 'secret' to have?" "Yes....I'm cumming!"


01 March, Saturday. A Night Out. We had a night out attending a fundraising event. After the event my wife wanted to go out with some of the women for a nightcap at a local bar. I told her to go ahead as I was tired. I enjoy seeing her go out with her friends, without me, having a good time. She drove with her friend B. We talked some when she got home. She told me how she felt and looked sexy tonight. I asked her if anyone had noticed her tonight. She told me that one of the men at the bar (who also happened to have been at the prior event) asked her if she could show up at an event he was hosting and 'just sit there and look pretty' for his guests. He told her she could wear a push-up bra. My wife liked the attention. She said she found R attractive (a second man who was also at the event) I told her that she should start dressing sexy for him every week, showing herself off to him (since she will be seeing him weekly for the next few months). I asked if she had been making eye contact with him and did she think he was attracted to her. She thought he was checking her out and mentioned how he leaned in close to her when speaking to her.

I told her how I liked it when she goes out with her girlfriends (& flirts with other men). She said she likes that I let her go out or be independent from me while we're out together in a social setting, but felt guilty about leaving me. I told her that I just want her to check in with me from time to time, but that I enjoy just watching her interact with others...keeping an eye on her from a distance. She's such a 'people person', very outgoing and draws others to her.


29 February, Friday. A Quick Call - G called today. I heard my wife saying "Why didn't you come up to the cabin last week?" She later told me that he said "Too much temptation up there." She had replied "Too bad, I was all alone all day on one of the days." Somehow the line got disconnected in the middle of their conversation, but she texted him a message: "I like being thought of as a temptation."


21 February, Thursday. Away on Vacation. We woke in the middle of the night, both feeling frisky. Something about being away in a strange bed that turns me on - I get extremely horny when staying in hotels or other foreign beds. I was alternating between fucking and eating her, finally cumming inside her. She hadn't cum and I went down on her again, using both hands on her ass while pushing both my thumbs into her pussy. She pushed hard against my hands and came hard.

We woke the the next morning to find her pussy still slippery and soaked from my licking and my cum. I told her how much I had enjoyed sucking her pussy as I began fucking her again. It had been a very passionate session with her squirming all over the bed and pressing into my mouth and hands. She told me how nice it had been. I enjoyed going down on her again after I had cum in her pussy. I told her how I was going to have Mary (a woman we have been in contact with about servicing us) clean her out like that after I came inside her pussy, just like I had done a few hours earlier. My wife really liked this and started to really grind her pussy and ass beneath me. I told her how I was going to force Mary's mouth onto my wife's pussy and make her suck my cum out as she licked and cleaned her...how I'd grab her by the hair and push her face into my wife's cum-filled pussy, forcing her to eat her. Suddenly, my wife cried out "I'm cumming, baby!" and convulsed. I continued to fuck her until I emptied another load into her.


15 February, Friday. 'The Rules' - She was in bed reading a book she had recently bought called The Rules. I've heard of it before - a book about the rules for a woman looking to land herself a man - to find someone to marry. I had been with her when she bought the book but wasn't really paying attention to the title. I asked her, "Who did you get that for? Me? or for lovers?" "Lovers" she replied. "To help you find a lover?" Again, "Yes". "I like that - it turns me on" I replied. "I know it does"

Later we were talking about our upcoming trip to the cabin. "Invite him up to the cabin with us" I told my wife. We were talking about G, having him come up for a few days with his daughter for some skiing. We both felt it would be a good location to have them 'consumate' their relationship. (I ended up calling him on the 17th and left a message inviting him to stay with us - I ended the message, "I know my wife wants to have you up there")


13 February, Wednesday G called today. We had been fucking and she didn't answer her phone. I had been reading a book on infidelity and marriage and struck up a conversation as we lay in bed. She told me that she found it strange that I want her to tell her potential lovers that I know of and approve of her activities. I replied that if it was just her and a one night stand or single hook up, that it wouldn't really make too much difference to me, although it'd turn me on knowing that she told them about being married and cheating. However, with friends or acquaintances it would be awkward for/to me if they were fucking my wife and did NOT know that I was aware of and approved. It'd be too weird for both her lovers as well as for me hanging or being around each other if they believed I was in the dark about it - it'd make my relationship with them awkward or sneaky. That is why for her to start fucking G, I think it's best to start off by inviting him for a threesome with us - the dynamic would be different, he'd probably feel more at ease with me knowing and involved - then if everything went well, she could continue to fuck him on the side when I am not home.

Office Visit

05 February, Monday. An Nice Effort - Her day alone. My wife texted me this morning. She was going to go to B's workplace to use his office computer. He had asked her to do something online for him but I had taken our laptop with me. She wasn't sure if he was going to be there when she arrived, but I told her to dress sexy for him just in case. She said she would.

As it turns out, he wasn't in his office when she arrived. She was disappointed that he never came to see her. B has a nice secluded rear office at his business - a perfect place for he and my wife to play and fuck. She mentioned that he hasn't been too flirty with her this past week. I assured her that it was probably just the busy-ness of life - for her to stay the course and continue her efforts to seduce him.

I heard her on phone with him later on at home telling him how she was still cold from being in his cold office alone. She told me he said it was because he wasn't there with her.

Small steps...

Reliving A Vey Hot Session

1 February, Friday - One Very Hot Play Session . I don't know why exactly, but the sex after an argument always seems to be the hottest. We had a small disagreement the night before. My wife and I were on the couch watching a little TV with her laying with her back against my chest - it's my favorite position for us because it gives me easy access to her breasts as well as her pussy when we're feeling randy. She had unbuttoned her jeans before snuggling in against me. After the show ended, I slid my hand down into her pants and over her freshly waxed pussy. She responded immediately by spreading her thighs and grinding her hips, forcing her pussy against my hand. Her eyes were filled with lust as we kissed. She was HOT and aroused!

I asked her, as I frequently do, "Whose pussy is this?" as I pressed my hand against her sex. "Yours" she whispered back. "Yes, it's mine. It's my pussy and your lovers' pussy soon. Mine to give to G, to give to B. You're ready to have another man's cock inside you, aren't you? You are ready to have a lover aren't you? I can tell you are ready now to fuck another man." "Yes" she breathed.The lustful look in her eyes told me that she was speaking truthfully - her face conveyed a look of sexual craving. I honestly don't think I have ever seen her look or sound more authentic as she answered me. I truly believe that she has mentally arrived at the place where she is prepared to fuck another man, specifically B or G. I mentioned how much she wanted G inside her. She replied "Yes, but only if you want me to be with him. Only if you give me permission. I want you to be the one to approve who I am with. You decide who"

We started talking about her being with B. "Soon you're going to be right here in this exact position, with B holding you just like I am, you slipping your tongue into his mouth as he slides his hand into your panties and discovers your waxed pussy." I said. "Yes", she replied, "Once he feels my smooth pussy, he's going to want to see it." "You want him to see it don't you? You want him to look at your smooth pussy." "Yes" she said "Your gonna spread your legs for him then, so he can get a good at you, just like you're doing right now for me. He's going to love it. He's going to want to slide his long fingers into your pussy and put his mouth on it." She just moaned as she continued to press her pussy into my fingers, humping my hand.

"He called me today, he called me three times but he kept hanging up so I finally called him. He told me he wanted to talk to me but kept having to take other calls. I told him that I didn't like when he doesn't call me and that he needs to be calling me." I was proud of my wife. It wasn't any kind of major accomplishment, but it turned me on that she was telling another man to call on her. I told her so. "I'm trying" she said. "I'm learning from what you tell me" "Tell him that he can call you at night" I told her, "Even while I am at home" She reminded me that B is married and would be at home at night. "You can tell him that you are alone at night and that it's OK for him to call on you" I said she should remind him when he neglects to call her - '..you didn't call me all day today.'

"I want to buy some sexy lingerie" "For who?..." I asked " ....for your lovers?" "Yes. I want to be sexy for them. This turned me on. "I love that you want to look sexy for other men and that you want to buy sexy clothes to wear for them" She said "I like being sexy for you too" "But you really want to be sexy for your lovers don't you?" "Yes, I do. I want some nice pretty bras. I want them to notice what I am wearing" I told her how much I liked that she'd be home alone, while I was at work, prepping her body for her lovers; making sure her pussy was waxed, dressing it for them, applying her makeup, and splashing her body with perfume.

"You're really looking forward to your Mondays and Tuesdays alone now aren't you? Those are going to be your 'date' days. You can work out early, come home and get dressed and ready for your lovers, putting on your lingerie, your jewelry, taking your time with your makeup, and getting sexy for them." She answered "Yes. I want you to pick out my outfit. Tell me what you want me to wear for them. I'd like it if you picked out my clothes before you leave and just set them out for me to put on." I told her I'd lay out her bra, panties (if I even wanted her to wear them at all), stockings, skirt and heels. "Yes, that's what I want you to do and I have to wear whatever you choose for me" she replied.

"I'm looking forward to your 'date' days also." I told her. "I'm going to like knowing that another man's hands are all over my pretty wife. Knowing that her lovers are using her pussy while I am not home, taking her right here in this exact place on the couch and in our bed. I can see you alone with your lover, spreading your legs for him just like you're doing for me now, sexy legs, painted toenails, waxed pussy, grinding and pressing your pussy into him. I can see your hand, with your pretty painted nails and your wedding ring, wrapped tightly around his thick cock, stroking it up and down"

"I want you to please your lover. I want you to make him feel good with your hands, your mouth and your pussy. You want to be a naughty little wife don't you?" "Yes" "The only people that will know will be you, me, your lovers and your close girlfriends who you will share with - B, M & D. Soon you'll have had lovers and affairs, just like M & D have had. You'll be a 'cheating' wife too. I had my fingers deep inside her and was applying pressure against her G-spot (or what I think is her G-spot) - each time I rubbed or pressed my finger against it, she would moan and grind harder against me. You can tell B all about your affairs. B will like hearing about it won't she?" "Yes, she will" my wife said. "You can tell her about you having two days a week alone for 'dating', how you seduced your lovers, where you go to fuck and what you do with them. B's going to want to know all about it, isn't she? Especially since she know your/our history - knows that you've been working towards being shared with other men and having a lover. "Bring B to the gym to workout with you. Maybe the two of you can go out and find lovers together, two sexy married wives fucking together."

I told her I was going to set up video cameras to tape her as she entertained men at home. "I want to see what you did while I was gone. I want you to have your lovers take pictures of you while they play with you and after they're through with you, so I can see how you look after being freshly fucked."

She was laying against me, her back against my chest. I grabbed both thighs, spreading her and exposing her pussy. "I want to hold you open like this while another man mounts you and slides his cock inside you" She said "I want you to do it for her." (We've been emailing with a young woman who enjoys sucking and licking pussy and likes being with older women.) "I will write her"

"I want to put you on the Pill so that you can be fucked bareback." The idea of putting my wife on the Pill for another man (or men) really arouses me. She said it doesn't excite her as much as it does me, but said she would go on the Pill for me and so she can be barebacked - she dislikes condoms, as I do, and is excited by and wants her lovers to be able to cum inside her pussy. I told her how naughty it would be if she went to her doctor to get the Pill, and in the process the doctor said to my wife 'Doesn't your husband already have a vasectomy?', to which my wife would reply, 'Yes, but these aren't for my husband...they are for other men' Naughty! To which my wife added "I'll tell her that I want to be put on the Pill because my husband wants me to...for when I am not with him"

I asked her if F (her lover from her cheating affair years ago) used to cum inside her unprotected pussy. "Yes" "You liked having him cum inside you like that, didn't you?" Again, "Yes". My wife had gotten up off the couch by now, stripped herself naked, had climbed on top of my prone body, and impaled her bare pussy on my hard cock. She was grinding away on my cock, pushing down hard trying to rub her clit against my groin. I told her that when she had set up her 'dates', she could text me at work telling me who she was going to fuck, where she was going to fuck and when she was going to fuck, so that as I looked at the clock at that time I would know that my wife was on her back being fucked by a lover or otherwise being handled and used by him. She could text me to let me know when she was finished with him and tell me what he did to her. I told her she could occasionally surprise me, by not telling me if she had a planned rendezvous with a lover that day. "The only way I would know whether you'd had another man inside you was by 'inspecting' you when I arrive. I want you to keep your lover's cum inside you for me to check when I get home." My wife likes the idea of having her pussy checked and inspected by me. "Yes, I want you to inspect me, to see if I have his cum inside me."

I was running my hands all over my wife's smooth ass as she rode my cock. It felt good - she has been working out for the last couple weeks working on getting into shape - I am proud of her. She was pushing and grinding hard against me. I could feel the head of my cock bumping against the back of her pussy. It felt good to be that deep inside her. "Can you feel my smooth pussy?" She was rubbing backwards and forwards on top of me. I could feel her swollen and wet pussy sliding on me. "Yes. Your pussy is ripe. It is ready for another man's cock. It is so ripe." I replied. She started convulsing and cumming. I grabbed her ass with both hands and drove into her until I came.

This was one of our hotter sessions in a long time. I like it when she gets more verbal, telling me what she wants and what she's going to do. I like knowing her [sexual] mind...knowing her darker side, her cravings. Most of the time I am the one doing most of the talking. Very hot!

Day of Reckoning

31 January, Thursday - Her Big Day. This was possibly going to be one of the biggest days (at least sexually speaking) of our marriage. Today was the day she and G had loosely set up for a 'date' when she would finally fuck him after many months of fantasizing by her (and surely G also) and slowly increasing flirtations that culminated with her bold sexual IM chat on Tuesday. Our conversation last night, however, had left things uncertain for today. My wife had reconsidered meeting with G today due to confidentiality concerns. There were no specific plans made on Tuesday regarding a meeting time or place. We had decided last night that we would carry on with our day today and she would deal with things when and if G contacted her.

My wife went to work out in the early morning. We had lunch together in the City as planned. I had not asked her about G nor had she mentioned anything about him calling her. As we walked back to our car, I asked her if she had given any more thought to our conversation about G from last night. "A little" she said. She planned to pull back from efforts with G for now. My concerns from last night apparently gave my wife pause for the time being. We agreed that she would continue to talk with G, especially since their mutual desire for each other was in the open now. She would make sure they were on the same page regarding his being discreet before being sexual with him or taking him as a regular lover.

She told me G did not contact her this morning, "You know I would have told you if he had"

She also said she would redirect her pursuit [back] to B, whom I thought would be a better or safer choice in lovers. She said she thinks he [still] wants her. I assured her that he did. I again suggested that she be bold with him. I told her that she needed to initiate the action with B - that on her next 'alone' or 'play' day, she should call him and tell him: [that] 'You haven't taken me out to lunch lately and my husband is working until this afternoon'

I told her not to be coy with B. I have heard him being suggestive enough times with her to know that all she needs to do is respond in an equally flirtatious manner and she would be able to have him. He has repeatedly served my wife openings on a sliver platter - soft tosses for her to jump all over, which have gone unrecognized or been ignored. Last week B had jokingly, but presciently, told her while on the phone, "Your problem is you don't know when someone wants you!" - a perfect opportunity for her to comeback with 'So are you telling me that you want me?' (She replied that I have told her the exact same thing many times, that she underestimates the power of her sexual attractiveness to/over other men) or when another playful conversation, also last week, led him to ask my wife "So are you offering to take me to lunch?", she could have come back with 'Well, I am trying to take you somewhere but it isn't to lunch' She claims that she is not quick enough with the snappy flirtatious comeback. I believe that she can be but that she either surpresses her instinct or that she chooses to be naive or coy when presented with these opportunities to take her flirtations to the next level. I think it's a learned protective response, so that she does not have to feel uncomfortable with the sexual tension.

She did admit that sexual tension is exciting. My suggestion to her was that from now on, whatever comeback she thinks of in response to men's sexual flirtations or double entendres, for her to always go one step further [than she is comfortable] with her reply and the result would be that she would have as many lovers or sexual couplings as she desired. She needs to be willing to play 'outside the box', closer to 'the edge' of comfort (or discomfort). I said she should stretch herself in these situations; to slowly adapt to being comfortable with a little discomfort or sexual tension. It's an example of the 'Risk vs. Reward' adage - the more you are willing to risk, the bigger your potential reward.

She mentioned to me that she did not like the idea of me leaving the house so that she could be with G. She didn't like the time limit effect of it, although I never mentioned a time limit to her that she could be with G. I had just told her to call me when she was through with him. She said it would feel like it was too time constrained, like she was a hooker on an appointment. She preferred having her two weekdays, the days that I worked until early afternoon, as her days to play with her lovers - as her days to herself to have 'dates' while I was away from the house, and the remaining days of the week to spend with me and/or family.

She also said she did not like it when I made suggestions as to what to say to B & G as I often do. Often I will suggest responses to their flirtations with her, or specific verbiage for her to include in her conversations or flirtations with them - teasing words, double-entendres, and other leading statements for her to cast out there for them run with. Mostly they have to do with her letting them know that she is open to playing with them and taking their relationship to the next [sexual] step or that I, her husband, am aware of her flirting, outside sexual interest in them and that I approve and am OK with it. She said that when I do tell her what to say to them, that it feels like it takes away her power as a sexy woman. My suggestions are almost always much more bold than she is comfortable with and she feels that they will make her appear [to B & G] as someone who she is not. She wants to proceed at her own pace with them. She fears that when she eventually ends up with them sexually, that their expectations of her would be based more on my urgings and suggestions than on her own suggestive remarks. I can understand her point of view on this and will try to let her develop at her own pace and have her own voice regarding her sexual pursuits. (I explained that my motivations have to do with my dominant nature, my desire for sexual control over her - (see entry Complete Ownership & Submission 12/30/06). She told me she still has difficulties with being completely submissive sexually to me despite her submissive nature and desire to be controlled (see her 'Little Wife' letter post 12/30/06)

In the end, today was not to be the day that she fulfilled both of our desires for her to be with another man. I think we're both OK with this though as some valid concerns arose that we've discussed. We're discovering that the path we're going down can be complex, and we'll continue to talk, refining what it is that we both desire, balancing sexual wants with needs for security and discretion.

The Devil's in the Details

30 January, Wednesday - Expressing my Concerns. We spent the day together, working out, having lunch, etc... A busy day without much talk or thought (besides my predawn fucking and sucking of her freshly waxed pussy) about my wife's pending and still tentative 'date' with G tomorrow. I had wanted to talk with her about rules and/or guidelines regarding her taking lovers and the first opportunity we had to do so was this evening just 25 minutes before I had to leave for work. Not much time and still unfinished, but I expressed a few of my thoughts and concerns:

- I reiterated the need for emotional detachment on her part, or the extreme importance of emotional non-attachment. How she was not to turn G into her confidant, shoulder-to-cry-on, or someone that she shares her/our problems with. She fully understood and agreed about the potential danger and risk of doing this.

- I reminded her that she was to remain in control of their 'relationship'. She was to be the one to set the tone for their 'dates' - the who, what, where, when. G becoming her lover was to be on her (or more loosely, our) terms. Specifically, for tomorrow she should let him know the time frame she would be available to him and to essentially let him know that she had other commitments, like a planned lunch date we have tomorrow.

- I told her that she needed to make certain that G would be discreet. Although he is also married, I expressed my concern of the possibility that he would 'talk' or be indiscreet with friends of his who are also friends of ours...specifically male friends. I recommended that she nail this one down right from the start - that if she couldn't get his iron-clad assurance of discretion, that the relationship as lovers would be a non-starter - that it would not be worth it for us. The community that we live in and our circle of friends and acquaintances is/are too small to put our reputations at risk. As I've mentioned here before, we've talked of playing outside of our community or with strangers to blunt any possibly embarrassing situations, but my wife has always felt more comfortable being sexual with friends or acquaintances.

I mentioned to my wife that those same qualities that attracted her to G - an extroverted personality, a quick-wit, a very 'male' guys-guy demeanor and macho exterior - are the same qualities that give [me] cause for concern about the possibility of him being indiscreet and bragging or talking about having bedded her. She agreed. Obviously, neither she nor I want her to be known for sleeping around. She already feels that there are some people, some women in our circle, who believe that she has some form of 'intimate' relationship with B already, probably due to the simple fact that my wife and B spend more than the usual amount of time together or on the phone due to the organization we all belong to. I assured her that there was nothing she could do to effectively change their minds if, indeed, they believed that, so don't worry about them.

My wife told me that she never had thought about the possibility of G talking and seemed genuinely concerned now, as well. She admitted that maybe she was being naive but asked me why I had never brought this topic up before with her. I confessed that, frankly, I hadn't expected her to get this far with G so suddenly (although she has wanted him since last spring or summer), and now that she was on the threshold of it actually sleeping with him, I needed to bring it up. She seemed a little distressed that she could have been directing her attentions to B all this time but said "I think there is still a possibility with B." (Of course there is, she had done nothing to close the door on B - she has just found G more attractive as a potential lover and had therefore directed more of her attention towards him).

I told her discretion is the reason that I have felt that B would be a more suitable lover for her. He is older than G, more mature, more life-experienced and possibly has more at stake, making discretion more assured as a result. She responded that she didn't know that I felt that way, and why hadn't I told her my opinion about my preference in who she took as a lover. Honestly, I think she is right - I don't think I have ever verbalized it to her. I've known that she wants G more than B, and I remember her mentioning to me a while back something to the effect of that the shine was off B for some reason or another.

I told her I thought it would be less of a concern if we were inviting G to join us for a threesome, versus just having him fucking my wife solo as a married woman. She agreed and understood what I was saying, although I'm not quite sure how to clearly explain it here, but I think there's a different dynamic involved if we to play as a threesome with my wife being the center of attention. I believe it feels more friendly, more of an intimate friendship as opposed to it being a man fucking another man's wife. I offered the threesome with G as a choice for her as well, although in the past she has told me that she did not think her lovers would be interested in threesomes. Tonight she sounded a more open to broaching the subject with G, but I could have read her wrong.

Of course, again, I also offered her the option of playing with or finding 'strangers' or 'lifestyle' partners as alternative.

My 25 minutes was running out and I had to leave for work. We had not discussed everything I had wanted to - we'd have to continue this discussion. Other rules and thoughts we still need to discuss include: condom use (or lack thereof - aka: barebacking & being put on the pill, playing alone vs. playing together (or with me present), hosting at home vs. at her lovers home, never allowing disrespect of spouse(s), playing/'cheating'/hotwifing online -via email, IM, honesty and trust as an absolute, frequency of 'dates', approval of lovers/giving permission, allowing of video & photos, playing alone vs. together...

She said she was going to pull back from her 'date' tomorrow and suggest to G that they meet instead to talk - to discuss expectations, desires, logistics, etc... before actually becoming sexual.

On The Threshold

29 January, Tuesday - As close as ever. I had been at work for seven hours when I thought of my wife. I hadn't heard from her at all today, which was a little unusual. I texted her to see what she was up to - "Flirting with G". I was intrigued. Our short exchange went like this:

Me (1/29 10:06): hello. What r u doing?
Wife (1/29 10:07): Flirting w G
Me (1/29 10:07): Tell me about it
Wife (1/29 10:07): I must get waxed didn't want to meet him without
Me (1/29 10:07): Tell him u have ur waxing appt set up tomorrow
Me (1/29 10:08): U texting or talking?
Wife (1/29 10:09): Texting but he did call
Me (1/29 10:10): Did u talk with him?
Wife (1/29 10:10): Little bit...tentative thurs but realized u r home
Me (1/29 10:11): U being bold with him? Let him kno what u want
Me (1/29 10:12): Tentative thurs for what? Fucking?
Me (1/29 10:13): I'm on lunch If u want to call & tell me about it
Wife (1/29 10:13): He said he owed me from last night I said diamonds might calm me he said what about him. I said that is what I truly want
Me (1/29 10:25): Love u...u r a very sexy woman and u did great today...u'll have ur lover in 2 days
Wife (1/29 10:26) I hope so

She called me on the phone at that point and proceeded to tell me about her flirtations with G. She was excited and I think a little giddy about it all. She had been at the gym when she received the first text message from G and she flirted and bantered with him for about the next hour as she worked out. From what she was telling me on the phone that she had said, it sounded like the most forward and direct she has been with G or anyone else. She was worked up a bit. She said she had been and still was nervous about it and had been shaking as she texted back and forth to him. She told me later in the afternoon as we fucked that she had become aroused and that her pussy became wet during their exchange. I was most impressed and even surprised about her message to me that said "tentative thurs, but realized u r home". Was she telling me what I thought she was??? Had she actually made plans with G to come over and fuck her? She asked me if I wanted to read what she had written to G. I'd be home in an hour.

G (8:50 am): I owe u.
Wife (8:51 am): diamonds might calm me
G (8:52 am): How about me
Wife (8:53 am): That's what I truly want
G (8:54 am): Better than diamonds
Wife (8:55 am): I know
G (8:56 am): U only can wear diamonds
Wife (8:57 am): Would rather wear other
G (8:58 am): Nice
Wife (8:59 am): thanks
G (9:00 am): For ? Haven't done anything yet
Wife (9:02 am): For anything that u might do
G (9:02 am): On my way
Wife (9:04 am): Man...Am in xxxxxx City working out
G (9:04 am): Oh well
Wife (9:04 am): But this is a good time. My husband works till 1
G (9:05 am): Awesome
Wife(9:06 am): I think so too - gives me a lot of alone time
G (9:09 am): U got to get to the grown up store and pick up some friends
Wife (9:12 am): All good honey
G (9:22 am): I bet
Wife (9:29 am): Am thinking that is a compliment while I shower
G (9:30 am): Mentally
G (9:32 am): With u
Wife (9:37 am): I like that, and u more and more

Wife (9:56 am): am serious but nervous & I do not have to delete (G had called my wife's cell before this message and was asking her if she knew where the 'delete' key was on her phone - a reference to me finding out about her and him, texting and fucking. She was attempting to indirectly tell him that I knew about everything she did (and approved) by telling him that 'I do not have to delete'. I don't think that he understood what she was trying to tell him. They decided during this call that Thursday was going to work for them to hook up, although my wife forgot that I was going to be home that day)
Wife (10:10 am): must make waxing appt first. that's what am trying to do today
Wife (10:24 am): i am at the store what size/brand?


As it turns out, she had been a hair away from realizing her desire to fuck G and take him as a lover. The only thing stopping her was the fact that she was not at home at the time and that she was not freshly waxed. G only lives a couple streets away, 2-3 minutes by car. While she had been texting with him, he had started over towards our house, stopping only when my wife told him she wasn't home. She told me that wanted to be smooth for him. She has always wanted G to know that she was completely bare as well as pierced. As we fucked I pressed her for the answer I already knew - "You wanted to fuck G today, didn't you? If you were at home when he told you he was on the way, you would have let him come over and fuck you, wouldn't you have?" She answered "Yes" to both questions.

I could tell by the forward nature of her texts to him that she had now crossed over in her mind and was ready to fuck him. She said that she was emboldened by the fact that [finally] he was the one to 'initiate' the sexual banter. Despite my telling her to the contrary, she has always felt that G (as well as her other prospective lover B) would not respond or would reject her if she were more forward and direct with them in communicating her desire to be sexual with them. She felt she had been giving them enough line to run with but that they had not 'taken the bait' and been responsive to her. Today was different....and it was all she needed.

She scrambled to get an earlier appointment for her brazilian waxing, which she had scheduled for tomorrow. She really wanted to be sexy for G and wanted to be waxed for him. I was aroused by the thought of my wife wanting to be sexy for her lover. She eventually found a salon that could accommodate her and she came home sore and red, but smooth.

We talked about it intermittently throughout the rest of the day and evening. She was still somewhat nervous about it actually happening, saying "We"ll see". Interestingly enough, we both seemed pretty calm only two days removed from her finally being fucked by another man besides me, her first since her affair some 14 years ago.

I think it's a calm-before-the-storm type of thing. Possibly a little sobering realization that we are on the threshold of a doorway that by crossing it has the potential to alter our relationship. For me, it's an odd kind of excitement.